Wednesday, January 26, 2011

A Hollywood Kind of Love



A few weeks ago, I read something on the newspaper that really stuck with me. Ryan Gosling, star from the 2004 popular romantic drama The Notebook, said that his movie can cause break-ups because it sets unrealistic romantic standards for real life couples.

"People would come up to me and tell me that they thought it was romantic, but one guy told me that he was engaged and (his fiancee) broke up with him after that movie because she said to him, 'You wouldn't build a house for me, would you?' He was like, 'Well, no, but I don't know how.'"

"She said, 'But if you knew how?' He said, 'No, I wouldn't. But it doesn't mean I don't love you.' She said, 'Yeah, it does.' And she called it off," narrated the 30-year-old actor.
(Read full article here)

During my drive home last week, Bruno Mars hit "Grenade" was playing on the radio and remembering Ryan Goslings article, I turned to my fiancee and jokingly asked:

"Would you catch a grenade for me? Throw your hand on a blade for me and jump in front of a train for me? Cus if you won't, you don't love me and i'm calling off our engagement."

Hahaha! It sounds silly and extreme but I wonder how many young kids nowadays have this idea of love?

What do you think about the message Hollywood is sending about love? 
Unrealistic? Or is my fiancee just really unromantic? haha!


tweet, tweet // i design clothing: www.herrohachi.com // book of faces

29 comments:

lizzy said...

i personally think that your fiance is sweet (despite the fact that i've never met/heard from your fiance). one reason being, he supports your herrohachi and all the antics that come with it.

i love love love notebook. i also believe that it is somewhat the culprit for my prolonged singledom - it made me believe that when you've found that one person, you just cant let go and one day s/he'll come back.

bad bad bad idea.

but i love the movie nonetheless.

i actually haven't heard that song in complete version, can you imagine??!!

.maitai said...

Kyyyymmm!!! I feel like I haven't talked to you in ages! [>_<]

That guy's fiancee breaking up with him over that is pretty ridiculous....[-___-]

But for the movie...from loooong ago, they've been making movies about crazy fantasies wrapped around the idea of love...and I think that even though some people will believe that that's how love should be, I think the people who are realists know that love doesn't always have to work out like that. I guess the movies DO influence people on what "love" should be, but it also shows us that love isn't confined to just the norm....ya know? Ehh, I dunno if I'm even making sense. Just typing mind-vomit I guess. lol :P

I'm definitely not like that tho. lol. I'm just happy if my significant is happy being with me :)

thegreenhairclip said...

i won't blame hollywood. it's a movie adaptation.

but that's sad.. :(

..and you're funny, Kym! :) i'm curious about your fiancee's answer..??

Susalie said...

I do think that a lot of romance films/chick flicks set unrealistic standards in real relationships, HOWEVER...if that woman seriously broke it off with her fiance because she tried to apply a Hollywood movie situation to real life, then they probably weren't right for each other in the first place. So that guy is better off :)

Klaudea said...

Ha I remember that song and I had a convo about how completely stupid it was. If my man loved me why would I want him to do something as stupid as risk his life for me? I told him if you see a grenade please RUN AWAY from it, DON'T CATCH IT.

Besides if a grnade was thrown at me he should push me away from it not catch the damn thing.

I never understood why girls deem things such as this romantic. To me it's romantic when a guy is willing to spend time doing something that you enjoy but he may find boring. And it's not just spend time, when he tries to enjoy those things despite the fact. Or when he does things foe you even if they may be unpleasant like housework without you having to ask! Now those are romantic!

Maybe I'm just practical but romance isn't risking your life for one another it is taking time to build a life together for one another.

Okay now I realized I can't scroll up to proofread on my phone so forgive my typos and autocorrects! LOL!

Eva said...

Lol i love the notebook and all but it's so unrealistic...

you should watch goslings new film Blue Valentine...very realistic and so good!

MJ said...

Definitely unrealistic. I don't really like shmultzy movies like the Notebook, but when I watched them I knew that it would be too demanding to expect that much from someone. I feel bad for the girls (and boys) that see that and think that's how it has to be, and even call off an engagement? How silly. Everyone's love story is different!

Vicky said...

Ahh, I remember the first time I heard that song and all I could think was "WTF! That's so frickin' stupid." I mean, I get it, you would do anything for this girl, but I definitely wouldn't want anyone singing this song for me.

And I do like The Notebook, but you can't go into it and think every guy you are in a relationship will do those things. That's why it's a movie/book. It's kind of as ridiculous as wanting your next bf to be like Edward Cullen.

mumuji said...

Hollywood is suppose to be over exaggerated and doesn't reflect real life although some silly people don't see it that way and take it literally.

I loved the Notebook!!

ochikeron said...

Hi Kym,

Your fiancee knows you are joking, hehe. But building a house sounds somewhat realistic. I think if the lady is easily swayed by movies (opinions of others) I think the guy better stay away from her X( Because the marriage is not that easy. haha

BTW, I used to read romantic manga when I was at junior high school and I remember my friends and I were crazy about romance! But nothing similar happened to us... reality X(

Anyways, now I'm into my stuff and I'm not into the romance, but my darling is still always a lover. Just right touch of LOVE is important for me. I guess!!!

RicAdeMus said...

I don't understand the context in which you asked him the question. No one should do those things just to PROVE they loved the other person. But if it was a question of doing them to save you, of course he would! My wife knows I would jump on a grenade for her, she was just talking about it two weeks ago--well, not a grenade, just that I make her feel safe. She said that while she was giving me that look that always scares me--a look like maybe my doctor called to tell her I'm dying, but she's not supposed to tell me!!! I would love to know what she's thinking in those moments, but she'll never say.

ochikeron said...
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ochikeron said...
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RicAdeMus said...

PS - I should have said my wife believes I'd jump on a grenade to save her. Until you face that situation, you can't be sure how you would react. But it's nice she has faith in me. =)

coffretgorge said...

i say YES. i have gotten myself in trouble too many times for expecting so much from my SO. one time i compared him to edward cullen. LOL stupid me. >:))

Nashe^ said...

OMG! Did that couple really break up?? The guy should feel lucky he's not tied to someone so daft anymore.

(Okay for the record, I hate that Grenade song. It's one thing to be all romantic, but it's another to exaggerate the whole concept!)

Susie said...

Lol! I really agree! Movies mess with your head -____-

Trish said...

im probably one of those unromantic people O_o either that or i just dont know that what im doing is romantic, im oblivious to that kind of thing when im the one doing so!

i think this is why i hate romantic movies, i still watch them, but in the end it just makes me go "ugh this does NOT happen in real life" im too logical when it comes to it T____T

Sarah said...

hahahahaa yea sometimes i think it'd be nice if people were a little more romantic but i'm way too logical to completely fall for the idea of a "hollywood romance". thankfully :P

Sarah said...

oh which reminds me! after the movie AVATAR came out, people were committing suicide because their lives were so "dreary" and they wished they could go to avatar. om f g right?!

Little Miss Tiara said...

LMFAO, I think I would just put up a "puppy eyes" act and ask it, meaning the boyfriend (if any, lol) just have to say yes to whatever I ask him to, I won't ask the second time, though :P my boyfriend should know this, haha... so now go tell my future boyfriend. lol

and yes! I'm back to the blogsphere! At last!

suki pooki said...

I think asking your man to build you a house is unrealistic and expensive!!! lol but all in all, movies/hollywood should be just taken lightly and as entertainment in my opinion. Though I do agree that they seem to make the bar high for both ladies and men. In the movies men will do the "impossible" and ladies too, whether it comes to looking good or waking up everyday at 6am to cook your man eggs and bacon, and still have sex with him at his every whim lol!

MizzJ said...

I think movies like this TOTALLY screw up both men and women's impressions of what love is. Sure, it's nice he did that, but seriously, if a guy built me a house even though I'd ditched him, that would kinda creepy. Real love is the little things that matter to you, not the big demonstrations. When you have someone who is always there on your side, supporting you, that is real love I think.

... daisy... said...

Movies are movies... reality is reality. Romanticism is great but too much is like drinking an espresso with five spoons of sugar...
I haven't seen the movie!

Hazel☺ said...

well, it would be nice to find a partner who could do everything in the name of love for their other half, but realistically speaking most men aren't like that! haha =P

<3 hazel
thethrifycloset

Wenny Yap said...

Hollywood movies are just exaggerations to the max. It's not say impossible in reality but it is just too much to expect. No one will ever know until the time comes, so just be happy and appreciate what we got as long as it's good.

A great example would be Chris Medina from American Idol 10.

Marie said...

Definitely unrealistic but fun to watch!:D

***** Marie *****
allthingsmarie.com

josie(bean) said...

#1) i am in love with ryan gosling, always have been. it would be very hard for me to not leave my boyf of 5+ yrs for him! hahah, totes jk. but for real, RG is a super qt.

#2) i think i am the only female alive who absolutely HATED The Notebook. it is 10000x more depressing than it is romantic. if anything, it makes me happier to know that i have someone to always share all my happiest memories with :)

#3) i also truly dislike bruno mars, but your remix made me lol. ahaha<3

SAVING BETTY said...

hahah love this post. i never really liked The Notebook, i thought it was too sappy for my liking. BUT now that I am going through a break up, I wish I can find a man like that....catch a grenade for me haha. Sigh.